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Author
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Topic: When girls don't put out!!
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KINGROY
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Member # 7736
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posted
 
 
When girls don't put out!! This was written by a guy...it's pretty damn smart.
Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfit s. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
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2003 Cobra Vert
2005 Prius
Posts: 1642 | From: Vallejo, CA | Registered: Jun 2007
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NiftyWhiteFifty
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Member # 4320
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by 90gtvert:
Lol...funny every time I see this on the net.
Mike
hahahahaha Nice! ![[patriot]](graemlins/patriot.gif)
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'05 F150 4x4
Posts: 2056 | From: San Jose | Registered: Mar 2004
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Sharks_30
New Member
Member # 8922
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posted
New to the Board.... Thought this was funny...LMAO.......
Posts: 6 | From: San Jose | Registered: Feb 2009
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925GT50
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Member # 2683
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posted
![[worship]](graemlins/worship.gif) good laugh there aint heard that one.
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1990 GT hatch (owned since 05')
1988 GT (sold)
1995 SN95 Cobra (totaled/parted)
1995 Pontiac Firebird Trans Am LT1 (daily driver)
Posts: 2443 | From: 925 | Registered: Apr 2003
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IvanFive0
built for twisties
Member # 5574
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posted
A little old, but still funny as hell. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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2012 Coyote - Daily
91 Coupe - HCI turbo
88 Mclaren - Griggs, T56, S trim, B50
87 Coupe
Posts: 883 | From: At the apex, passing you! | Registered: Apr 2005
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1sic50
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Member # 6684
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posted
that was funny LMAO....
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90 gt W/Vortech S-Trim power adder
99 Explorer W/5.0
87 crx honda WNP!!!!
Ford 4 Life Enough Said Don't Hate
Posts: 534 | From: GOTHAM CITY | Registered: Apr 2006
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87droptop50
Go Giants!
Member # 7185
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posted
Damn I needed a good laugh
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HighSpeed Motorsports
87Mustang Gt Conv kurgan tuned
03Harley F150 #5023
69El Camino SS396 -sold
99 f350 7.3 DRW
Posts: 3855 | From: SF | Registered: Oct 2006
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92stangLX
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Member # 3252
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posted
Nice one. That should have a warning on it that says "MEN DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME"
Posts: 5302 | From: San Francisco | Registered: Sep 2003
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ModularMotorz
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Member # 5954
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posted
Good stuff
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1996 MUSTANG GT
2003 MUSTANG COBRA
2001 CROWN VICTORIA P71
Posts: 1014 | From: Daly City | Registered: Aug 2005
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Tha91SiCkNeSs
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Member # 5790
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posted
Has anyone ever actually tried this??
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2003 Cobra
Posts: 565 | From: Sacramento | Registered: Jun 2005
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Coyoteswapfox92
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Member # 4057
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posted
This Never gets old...
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1992 Coyote project under construction.
Posts: 1051 | From: Yuba City, Ca | Registered: Jan 2004
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TwoTone91GT
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Member # 7254
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posted
wow.... good laugh got me during the middle of the story haha i was like man hes doing all that to get some hm...
Posts: 469 | From: Elk Grove,Ca | Registered: Nov 2006
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87Fox916
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Member # 6399
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posted
Funny.
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87 Mustang GT
Posts: 1652 | From: SACRAMENTO | Registered: Jan 2006
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