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Author
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Topic: The Married life:)
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FoRdGiRl
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Member # 6279
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posted
 
 
A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. "I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... "
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar....you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"
and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story
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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
Posts: 1881 | From: rescue | Registered: Dec 2005
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castor
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Member # 2765
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by FoRdGiRl:
A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. "I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... "
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar....you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"
and...they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story
Bum-Bum, CHING!!! [applause] ![[patriot]](graemlins/patriot.gif)
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SOLD!!! 7/07
Supercharged 92GT
352rwhp [old blower w/3 1/2lbs]
???rwhp w/S-Trim
2010 Acura MDX Tech/Entertainment
2013 Acura TL SH-AWD
Posts: 1457 | From: San Francisco | Registered: Apr 2003
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xcessive50
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Member # 2995
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posted
my wife would have got slapped talkin that kinda shit.
Posts: 363 | Registered: Jun 2003
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LQ9SN95
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Member # 7080
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by xcessive50:
my wife would have got slapped talkin that kinda shit.
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
why i would never...........maybe dick slap, thats bout it, but then it wouldnt really teach her a lesson cuz she'll like it! ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif) ![[dance]](graemlins/dance.gif)
[ May 23, 2007, 03:11 PM: Message edited by: F8LSN8K ]
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http://www.fastgms-teamfast.com
http://www.facebook.com/aop.fresno?ref=ts&fref=ts
Lq9 swap
102 fast intake
Trick flow heads
T rex cam
Posts: 8031 | From: Fresno, Ca | Registered: Sep 2006
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xcessive50
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Member # 2995
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posted
HA HA i'm just kiddin but seriously, i wouldnt be in that kind of disrespectful marriage
[ May 23, 2007, 03:12 PM: Message edited by: xcessive50 ]
Posts: 363 | Registered: Jun 2003
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Pure Stang
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Member # 7251
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posted
LOL funny good why to ease up the tencion of finals ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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HEART BREAKER
R.I.P Willie Guzman (5ltrsvt) you will be missed brother.
04/24/87 - 11/23/2012
90 lx 347 RIP
86 gt
89 lx- next project
Posts: 6497 | From: San Jose | Registered: Nov 2006
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FoRdGiRl
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Member # 6279
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posted
thought you guys would like it and i personally think shes a pimp for that id let my husband go out to bars and stuff w friends but definitly could see myself doing that hahaha
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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
Posts: 1881 | From: rescue | Registered: Dec 2005
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BlkPina
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Member # 934
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posted
my step-mom is like that... she would drive me nutz! ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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http://www.myspace.com/laurenjennifer22
00nhra edt formula-lid, cutout, pulley, ls6 intake rip
00 t/a- fipk filter, electric cutout, lt headers
Posts: 1255 | From: Castro Valley | Registered: Feb 2002
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1Sicgt
CAFords OG
Member # 714
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posted
Ya the shit might be true if you are a newlywed. Wait a few years then its "get your own damn beer you lazy shit!!!"
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14 Focus TS ST3 full Stg3, ready for bigger Turbo
2003 Cobra Track Car
Posts: 8145 | From: Hitting the Apex | Registered: Jan 2002
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stangless
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Member # 1414
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by 1Sicgt:
Ya the shit might be true if you are a newlywed. Wait a few years then its "get your own damn beer you lazy shit!!!"
That's why you upgrade.
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=(
Posts: 4634 | From: bay | Registered: Jun 2002
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BCINGUU
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Member # 2397
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posted
I was thinking damn, she bought beer? And she offered to bring him one? In a cold glass? And then make snacks?
Who is this woman? I'd sure as hell stay home with her.
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93 Cobra #4563 347ci 12.0@118 505rwhp 524tq
90 GT "Saleen Cobra" style convertible 347ci
67 GT "Eleanor" style coupe 347ci
Posts: 1425 | From: San Jose, CA | Registered: Jan 2003
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